In this article, Rob Jones outlines some of the historical background to the crisis in masculinity in Australia today.  He presents four presuppositions for a Ministry to Men and concludes with a challenge to all men to join the quest for authentic manhood. 

Something has happened to the Australian male. Something has crept into the very fabric of our men’s souls that has created a crisis in their manhood. John Eldridge in his book Wild at Heart says, ‘every man knows that something’s happened, something’s gone wrong… we just don’t know what it is.’ Men are waking up in the morning with an anxiousness that seems to have no immediate source and have needs that they don’t seem to be able to connect with. Manhood, once a virtue to be travelled on, now seems more like a problem.  

The historical roots of the crisis in Australian masculinity can be traced to two major events – the Industrial Revolution and The Second World War.  

At the end of the 1800’s the majority of people lived and worked on farms and provided for and protected their family.  The traditional woman worked the home. She raised and nurtured the family and provided support for her husband. Such families spent most of their time at home and only occasionally would they venture into the city.

With the advent of the industrial revolution, society embarked on a new and very different way of life, as families moved off the farms to the cities. With this change came a blur in the traditional role distinctions. To add to the role confusion, Charles Darwin, at the end of the 1800’s proposed the idea, that man was not a unique creation of God but in fact, was something that evolved out of the “primordial pond” and was ever-changing. This inferred that humankind’s roles and understanding was constantly in an upgrade and one couldn’t count on anything as fixed and permanent.

At the same time Karl Marx proposed that the ideal society was a classless, genderless society which he called Communism. In this system everything would be held in common and everybody was to be equal.  These new philosophies and the new change that occurred in the industrial revolution, made a significant contribution to the different ways men and woman saw each other and their masculine and feminine roles. 

World War 2 and After

After World War 2, men returned home from the battlefields of Europe and Asia and became the first generation of men who en masse disconnected from their family responsibilities. This disconnection occurred because, firstly, the war had forced the young men to be rapidly exposed to the “ravages of life” way ahead of their years causing a determination to recapture some of their lost childhood. Secondly, they came back to a world that was brimming with new opportunities and prosperity. They were told, “You could have it all”, and that’s exactly what they set out to achieve.  They chased ambitions endlessly, and in the process they left their homes and became disconnected from their families.

In the fifties, women increasingly complained about their husband’s growing disconnection from family life. By the sixties, a whole generation of young people grew up watching their fathers spending a majority of their time frolicking in the amenities of prosperity but never giving their hearts to the home or the family. In addition to this neglect, parents were putting up a façade about their marriage pretending everything was normal.  So the sixties saw a whole generation of young people striving for authenticity. From this came the “Flower Power” generation and their rallying cry – “Make Love not War.”

The seventies and eighties feminists demanded the freedom that the men had, the freedom to live life on their own, to do what they wanted to do and to heck with everybody else and they too left the home.

While all this is an oversimplification of the social history of this period, and while the many imbalances and inequalities between men and women were being addressed, these changes nevertheless had a profound impact on families and the status quo. Family life was under attack from so many different quarters.

For example,  a recent government report on The Education of Australian Boys (October 2002) stated that between 1981 and 2000 the number of couple families with children under 15 years of age in which both parents worked, increased from 41% to 57% . The report goes on to conclude that all this raised concerns about under-fathering… which is particularly detrimental to boys.

Even now in the nineties, after 100 years of the industrial revolution, with the social roles blurred and the social responsibilities abandoned by both men and women, both genders are finding themselves asking the question “who are we and what is our purpose in life?”

This confusion over social roles has greatly damaged the family unit and has had a dramatic effect on the psyche of the Australian male. One only has to look at some of the local TV advertisements to see the role portrayed by the Australian male in society. He is often depicted as one who is mentally and socially challenged while the woman has it “all together” and in charge. Men are continually seen as the misfits in society.

Australian manhood is in crisis. One only has to look at the make up of the calls from the recently launched Mensline Australia to see the magnitude of this crisis.

A snapshot of a Mensline (100,000 calls in the first 16 months) caller suggests that he is most likely to be aged between 29-49 years, with full-time or part-time work, living alone or in shared / support accommodation, most likely to be separated or divorced, and has children. His principle concerns will be about separation and/or shared parenting arrangements. He is most likely to be anxious or depressed and feeling socially isolated. He is likely to be on the line for approximately 22 minutes. If he accepts a referral to another service, it is most likely to be to relationship counselling, men’s programs or legal services. (Mensline FACTS and STATS Feb 2003)

Obviously the solution to this shortfall in society is complex and far reaching. No one movement or resource is going to correct this need. It was with a deep desire to try and fulfil some of these needs, that a group of men in Kenmore Queensland came together to form the Ministry To Men. (MTM)

MTM is built on four key presuppositions.

Australian Manhood is in a state of confusion. 

Since the inception of MTM 4 years ago, working with Australian men has provided some revealing facts.

• Men are having difficulty articulating a deep discomfort in their life.
• Men feel disconnected from their fathers and want to somehow be re-connected.
• Men’s vision for masculinity was once great but has been reduced to a “40 and out vision” with little or no sense of fulfilment. This often has led to the famous ‘mid life crisis.
• Men are experiencing loneliness.  They have plenty associations, but they don’t have any real friends. They have issues and want to have someone to help them figure them out.
• Men are Drifting. There is no sense of internal vision in their life. They are being led by external stimulation, reacting to life, rather than being led internally.

Manhood, something that used to stir the hearts of men as some kind of noble pursuit in life now seems more like a problem that has to be overcome.  AS Garrison Healer states ‘the bitter truth is that confused men create big problems.”

In Australia it has been estimated that fatherlessness and family break down is costing Australia $13 billion dollars per year.

• 90% of all the major crimes that are committed in Australia are committed by men. 
• 99.8% of all the rapes that you see in the newspaper are committed by men.
• 95% of all the burglaries in Australian are committed by men. 
• 91% of all the abuse and offences against family and children are committed by men. 
• 94% of all the drunken drivers that drive the streets of Australia are men. 
• 85% of single parent families in Australia are fatherless.
• 37% of all family units in Australia have no father or male influence for the children

Boys from fatherless homes are:

• 5 times more likely to commit suicide
• 14 times more likely to commit rape
• 9 times more likely to drop out of school
• 10 times more likely to abuse chemicals
• 9 times more likely to end up in a state institution
• 20 times more likely to end up in prison

Years ago, the famous psychologist Rollo May made this statement. 

“The clearest picture of the empty life is the suburban man who gets up at the same hour every weekday morning, takes the same train into work in the city, performs the same task at the office, lunches at the same place and leaves the same tip for the waitress, comes home on the same train each night, spends a two week vacation at the shore every summer, which he does not enjoy, goes to church every Christmas and Easter but does not really know why, moves through a mechanical routine existence year after year until he finally retires at age 65 and very soon thereafter dies of heart failure, possibly brought on by repressed hostility.” 

This is still a conventional pattern for many Australian men in life today. They are being gowned down and burnt out. Their heads are down and their necks are tight and they are determined to make it work.  But they never stop to pull their heads up and look at the ‘landscape of life’ and ponder questions such as: 

• What are the higher things that men are called to be as men?
• What are the more noble attributes of masculinity?
• What are the more fulfilling things of being this gender? 
• What is my calling before God and country as a man? 

Australian men are hungry for answers to these questions of life. Raise a flag anywhere in Australia today and talk about men’s issues and you will draw a crowd. Men know deep down, that something is not right.

There is no convincing vision of manhood.

Consider this anonymous poem as a compelling vision for Australian men today. 

True Manhood

What is a man?

Is he someone who is strong and tall?

Or is taught and talented as he plays ball?

Is he someone who is hardened and tough, who smokes and drinks and swears enough?

Is he someone who chases woman hard with a quest to conquer but never dropping his guard?

Is he someone with a good business mind who gets ahead of the others with his nose to the grind?

Or is he someone who tries his best but not really caring about any of the rest?

What is a man?

Does anyone know?

Tell me who is the prototype, to whom shall we go?

Where do Australian men go to find these answers to life? Where is the prototype?

Where is the image that causes their soul to be uplifted and encouraged and inspired?

For many men today there are no answers, just silence.  But there is hope.  The quest for authentic manhood in Australia lies with the family unit – a hope to reinvent and rejuvenate families. 

The greatest resource this country possesses lies in the families of our nation. At the same time, the strength of our families and the destiny of Australia depends much on the quality of the relationships between its mothers and fathers and their children. Equipping and supporting fathers and mothers in their relationships help ensure that our children have the best possible future. The best social security system the world has ever known is the traditional family unit - a loving father, mother and their children - is the best way to nurture, educate and protect children.

However for a variety of reasons, many Australian men do not find themselves in a marriage relationship. Others are in personal crisis and are often left alone and in despair. Irrespective of their marital status, MTM wants to support all dads and men to fulfil their roles as effective fathers as well as to become men of Authentic Manhood.

The plight of Australian men is both a natural and a spiritual problem. It needs a strategic and synergistic partnership that should involve government, business, church, community, faith-based and secular charities and many others working together to strengthen and support Australian men. 

Men of Australia, I believe it’s time to join the Quest for Authentic Manhood and be the men and fathers we were created to be. We cannot do this on our own and it’s time for all of us to come together as never before and be the leaders of our homes, our communities, and our nation.

For many of us this will mean we will need to seek help and guidance, which can be sought out at organisations such as MTM, churches, community groups and so on. Many of us have deep issues in our lives that need to be faced up to and dealt with. It’s time to be released and set free.

If this is the cry of your heart, take action now.

If you take the initiative I can promise you three things:

1. You will begin to gain a clearer definition of Manhood in terms of your work, family, finances, faith, fitness, friends and fun in life.
2. You will make some significant personal discoveries.
3. You are going to make some new and special friends, who are going to pursue the same goal as you - Authentic Manhood.

No matter where you are at today be encouraged. Help is available and groups all around Australia are addressing these issues. 

Rob Jones

MTM Australia

1. Make that call today.
2. Find out more about the 12 Point Plan for addressing Fatherlessness in Australia.
3. Mentor a friend or colleague who needs and wants help.
4. Tell someone if you are struggling.  You can’t fix it on your own.
5. Don’t wait for months to address relational problems.  They won’t just ‘go away.’ Be proactive before serious consequences occur.
6. Be ‘the best dad in the world’ to you children.
7. If you are separated or divorced, show goodwill and respect to your children’s mother.
8. Don’t wait for the Government to fix your problems.  Take responsibility within the framework of your own resources.  Remember, start by fixing ‘you’.  Change yourself, change your circumstances.
9. Spend time with your boys.  (Boys from fatherless homes are 5 times more likely to commit suicide; 14 times more likely to commit rape; 9 times more likely to drop out of school; 10 times more likely to abuse chemicals; 9 times more likely to end up in a state-operated institution and 20 times more likely to end up in prison.)

Special thanks to Robert Lewis author of Authentic Manhood and Warwick Marsh of the Fatherhood Foundation